Size Matters

Now that I have a newborn in my arms again, Eva looks positively enormous to me by comparison. Her size 5 diapers make Amanda's look like doll diapers, even though she's already outgrown the newborns and upgraded to size 1. When Amanda stretches out, her feet barely brush my lap, but Eva's feet already reach down to my knees. After lifting Eva's nearly 30lbs, Amanda feels light as a feather. Comparing their clothes is amazing. And seeing them side by side, with Eva's head laying next to her sister's tiny one, she looks almost grown-up by comparison. It amazes me that only a month ago I was admiring how Eva had just enough baby fat left in her face, hands and feet to keep her looking delightfully like her baby self. Eva not only looks older to me now, but I'm astonished to find that I'm starting to view her as potentially dangerous as well.

No longer is she simply my innocent little toddler, trying to learn about her world and test the limits. Now, through no fault of her own, she's a potential baby attacker. There's not one place in the house where I can set the baby down without worrying that Eva will manage to climb up and possibly hurt her if I dare to turn my back for a second. Already she has tried at different times to pull Amanda's hair, slap her, pull her arm in the wrong direction, and nearly smothered her with a kiss - all while I was holding her and trying to keep Eva at bay! I think Eva thinks that Amanda is made of the same stuff as her longsuffering dolls. "Gentle, Eva!" has become a constant mantra in our house. She loves to be near her sister, to touch and kiss and play with her, not realizing her own strength or Amanda's fragility. She gets really upset if we have to separate her from the baby, so we do our best to protect Amanda without pushing away Eva. It's a tough balance to keep.